Sunday, November 27, 2016

BD3 Media Matters

164 Days
I have had the unique opportunity of sharing our love story and our love tragedy with multiple media outlets. The media interest came primarily by route of the goodness of strangers on the social media site reddit for whom I am very grateful. They helped me convert a handful of Sharry’s recorded songs that JJ and I listen to pretty much daily.

At first I was very hesitant to open up to the wide world of online journalism. Sharry was usually a very private person, I tend to strongly dislike seeing pictures or videos of myself, the tragedy is very recent and my broken heart is still empty and raw. Yet the opportunity to share Sharry’s voice, light, goodness and inspirational legacy and to spread compassion and love eventually led me to answer in the affirmative.
Shar was a fabulous aunt 

Below is a list of media outlets (that I know of) that have shared at least some aspect of our story with most taking the goodness of strangers approach, which I love as it adds a few drops of kindness, compassion and gratitude to world’s often troubling narrative.

CBS This Morning The most thorough video investigation
The Spectrum (local newspaper) The most in depth look at our love story
I think our story is one that speaks to the innermost fears and desires of many. The desire to find someone, a soul mate, a best friend and forever love who you can share your life with and connect on a deeper level than you ever thought was possible. The fear of loss, to tragically lose a treasured loved one way too early.

I have received hundreds of messages from people thanks to these stories. Messages of condolences and love. Individuals sharing how they listen to Shar’s songs, the voice of an angel for comfort and peace. Fellow pilgrims in suffering along life’s journey who share with me their own stories of love, loss and pain. People in relationships commenting that they have been inspired by our story and by Shar specifically to live life to the fullest and to love more authentically and deeply. I LOVE receiving messages like these and they help me feel confident that I have made the right decision in sharing the BD3 story, LoveSharred.


Also in case you were curious Thanksgiving has been pretty rough. As great as it is to be surrounded by wonderful and loving Buhanans and Deckers, the holidays are a poignant reminder that physically, at least, Shar is no longer here and will not be ever again. On Thanksgiving I spent two hours at the cemetery talking to Sharry and napping by her graveside. Great start to the holidays haha!

JJ photo fun below:
Buhanan family annual Turkey Trot

Hanging with cousins

Hike to elephant arch with Grandpa Decker and Uncle Josh

Red Cliffs hike with Uncle Josh


  1. She is perfect, isn't she, sitting on that bench?

    I prayed for you and JJ last night. I thought about how hard it must really be for you to be living with your...parents (or maybe just your mom, I cannot remember). No one, NO ONE is feeling what you are feeling. Grief is such a lonely, lonely walk. People move on but you feel stuck and sometimes, even when it is not said, you can FEEL that people think your grief should be done. Or they see the smiles, the laughs and think how WELL you must be doing when, in reality, you just want to lay down and die.

    Then slowly, oh-so brutally-slowly (I'm talking a LONG time from now), you will feel yourself awakening from your grief and you will feel so much better but you will also miss your grief some. It is just a roller coaster that you have to ride. I miss her for you. It's so unfair.

  2. it feels really nice to see the family flourishing and bonding through such amazing trips. the pictures capture the true essence of it all\