Friday, December 23, 2016

Circle of saving...and babies

Sharry saved JJ and JJ saved(s) me.
I really believe that Sharry saved her baby boy. For 9 months of pregnancy she did all that she could to take care of her new beloved little baby. She took vitamins, ate extra healthy, drank lots, and even wore a breathing mask outside during the bad air days in Salt Lake. She talked to him, sang to him and rubbed her belly even as he was providing her with swollen feet, heartburn and jutting out baby parts. On his birthday, 6/16/16, when the freak tragedy of amniotic fluid embolism struck, Sharry’s life was taken but his was not. According to the Amniotic Fluid Embolism Foundation mortality rates for infants in the womb are as high as 65% and out of those 45% that survive the rates of neurologic impairment can be very high. So far JJ is outperforming all of the specialists’ early fears. I believe Sharry did all in her power (on both sides of the veil) to make sure that her baby boy would be ok.

Our 2015 Christmas Card photo

The oldest Christmas card photo...that I could find on my computer
JJ saved and continues to save me now and into the future. If he had not survived there would have been a very high likelihood that I either would have ended my life or lost myself to insanity. JJ provides so much meaning and love in my be totally honest he provides a lot of stress, frustration, sleepless nights AND love, joy, laughter and meaning. One friend recently pointed out that he is a living hug from Sharry to me. I owe my life to baby JJ and he owes his life to his angel mama.

Now I need to dedicate my life to saving others through the BD3 family goal of bringing greater compassion and love to the world. I am blessed with a wealth of inspiration. I have the memories of Shar’s life and passion, her words and legacy. I am also inspired by three babies in this season of Christmas.

I turn to baby Jesus for faith and to find the Christ heart in me and all, learning to love as he did and to help bring the kingdom of heaven here to Earth. This holiday season the babe born in a manger who grew to be the man of sorrows, the Christ/Messiah is a light in my life and a beacon of hope for a better world here and a forever family in the next.

Maya Devi and Buddha's birth
I look to baby Siddhartha to guide me to my own Buddha mind that can bring insight, wisdom and compassion in suffering. The legend says that when his mom conceived she was told from a dream that her child would go on to be a great powerful military leader who conquered the world or a sage who brought enlightenment to all living beings. He grew up to become “The Buddha” or awakened one.

JJ shows me the future and hope. Despite all my depression, grief, loss and sadness he brings light, love and a future with at least one thing to believe in.

Merry Christmas and good riddance 2016!

St George Decker fam visiting a Santa at Uncle Justin's work
JJ and Santa Daddy


  1. My wishes and prayers to you and JJ on this Christmas. May 2017 give you more strength, peace, calm, good health and cheer.

    Will remember you'll in my prayers,
    A well wisher from the land of Buddha (India) 🙏

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